School jokes can be a learning experience!
All sorts of things happen in the classroom that you find amusing.
Just think about how class went today. What did you find amusing?
What caused someone to giggle.....and maybe get into a little trouble with the teacher.
Anytime you get that many kids together in one place, there's bound to be something funny happen.
You can take that event and turn it into a joke to tell to all your friends.
Don't forget to tell us too!
In the meantime, check out my list of school jokes below......
On the first day of school, the kindergarten teacher said to her class, "If you need to go to the bathroom, please hold up two fingers."
A little girl in the back of the room piped up, "How's that suppose to help?"
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Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
Because her students were so bright!
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Why was the math book so sad?
Because it had too many problems!
Cindy came to school without her homework assignment.
"Where is your homework?" asked her teacher.
"I ate it." replied Cindy
"Now why would you do such a thing?" asked the teacher.
"Well you told us that it would be a piece of cake!"
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What did the student think about his grades?
Lesson I thought!
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How do you know you are at the top of the class?
When you're the first climbing the rope in gym class!
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The math teacher asked his class, "If I have twelve apples in my right hand and ten apples in my left, what would I have?" From the back of the room a voice says, "Really big hands!"
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What did the student say when the teacher told him to quit daydreaming.
I wasn't, I was sound asleep!
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Why is the library so tall? Because it has so many stories!
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Amy was counting to ten for her math teacher.
"One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, ten." said Amy.
"Didn't you forget something? What about nine?" asked the teacher.
Amy replied, "Oh no, seven eight nine!"
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How much fun can you have doing arithmetic?
Sum fun!
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How did the student fail everything except math?
He didn't take math!
------------------------------- Each student in the class was called on to make up a sentence using words that the teacher gave them.
When it got to be Joey's turn, the teacher asked him to use the words, defeat, defense, deduct and detail.
Joey thought about his words for a minute and finally responded with, "Defeat of deduct went over defense before detail!"
What kind of table has no legs?
Multiplication table!
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George handed his teacher a doctor's note for his absence from class the day before. "This is your handwriting!" exclaimed the teacher.
"Well the doctor borrowed by pen." said George.
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If the questions were so easy, why did Joey fail the test?
It was the answers that were hard!
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When does history repeat itself?
When you fail it the first time!
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Jimmy came home from school all excited. His mom asked him what had happened at school that was so exciting.
Jimmy said, "I made a hundred in two subjects today!"
Jimmy's mom was so happy. She said, "How'd you do that?"
"I got a fifty in math and a fifty in science!"
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What's the difference between a train and a teacher?
The train says "Choo Choo" and the teacher says,"Spit that gum out!"
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How did the student scrape his knee? He went on a class trip!
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The teacher called on Sam and asked him to make up a sentence using the word lettuce.
Sam thought about it for a minute and then said, "Please lettuce out of class early today!"
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Why couldn't Jerry remember what he read out loud?
He wasn't listening!
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Why did the student think the pencil slowed him down?
Because it was made out of lead!
--------------------------------- Henry told the teacher he didn't bring his homework to school because he lost his memory.
"When did this start?" asked his teacher.
"When did what start?"
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Why do fish do poorly in school? Because they are below 'C' level! ---------------------------------
What is the best class?
Recess!
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The teacher asked Jeff, "If you had one dollar and you asked your dad for another one, what would you have?"
"One dollar." said Jeff.
"You don't know your arithmetic," said the teacher.
"Oh no, " said Jeff, "you don't know my dad!"
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What do students read in the Lone Star State?
Tex-books!
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Why did the student mail a clock to his science class?
He wanted to see time travel!
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Sally was called into the principle's office after class. "I found out you cheated on your test." said the principle. "So I am changing your grade from an A to an F. Do you have anything to say?"
"Wow!" says Sally, "That's pretty degrading!"
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Why are some school classes not very interesting?
Because they were developed by the Bored of Education!
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Why do spiders do so well in computer class?
They love the web!
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Students were studying for a history test when one of the student's said, "I wish we lived way back in time."
"Why is that?" asked the history teacher.
"Then there wouldn't be so much history to learn!"
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Why did the student take her math homework to gym class?
She wanted to work out her problems!
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Why did the student think his teacher was color blind?
Because every time she caught him cheating, she said she was seeing red!
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The student's came to class on their first day of school to find a stallion as their teacher. While he was a large stallion, he had a small squeaky voice that the student's found amusing. So much so that everytime the stallion spoke they laughed hysterically.
The stallion spent the whole day yelling at them to quiet down. He yelled so much he lost his voice.
The next day the stallion brought a pony with him to class. The pony was small but had a deep loud voice. He bellowed to the student's to "PAY ATTENTION OR ELSE!"
The children quieted down and paid attention. Which only goes to show you that to get things done you have to shout until you get a little horse.
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What do you call a student who can subtract, multiply and divide, but can't add?
A total failure!
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